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Perfect Daughters: Adult Daughters of Alcoholics
Get Free Ebook Perfect Daughters: Adult Daughters of Alcoholics
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This new edition of Perfect Daughters, a pivotal book in the ACoA movement, identifies what differentiates the adult daughters of alcoholics from other women.
When this groundbreaking book first appeared over ten years ago, Dr. Ackerman identified behavior patterns shared by daughters of alcoholics. Adult daughters of alcoholics-"perfect daughters" -operate from a base of harsh and limiting views of themselves and the world. Having learned that they must function perfectly in order to avoid unpleasant situations, these women often assume responsibility for the failures of others. They are drawn to chemically dependent men and are more likely to become addicted themselves. More than just a text that identifies these behavior patterns, this book collects the thoughts, feelings and experiences of twelve hundred perfect daughters, offering readers an opportunity to explore their own life's dynamics and thereby heal and grow.
This edition contains updated information throughout the text, and completely new material, including chapters on eating disorders and abuse letters from perfect daughters in various stages of recovery, and helpful, affirming suggestions from Dr. Ackerman at the end of every chapter. This book is essential for every one who found validation, hope, courage and support in the pages of the original Perfect Daughters, as well as new readers and every therapist who confronts these issues.
Also includes: a comprehensive reference section and complete index.
Product details
Paperback: 334 pages
Publisher: HCI; Revised edition (July 1, 2002)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 1558749527
ISBN-13: 978-1558749528
Product Dimensions:
6 x 0.8 x 9 inches
Shipping Weight: 14.4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
Average Customer Review:
4.4 out of 5 stars
138 customer reviews
Amazon Best Sellers Rank:
#23,472 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
Wow! What a book! I read 2 times already...I honestly felt that book was written for me. My father was an alcoholic, I am the oldest of 3 siblings and I totally ifentified with this book. This book has helped me understand a lot of things about my adult behavior. This is one of my favorite highlights:"To be a good COA, you were called upon to deny the alcoholism and other family problems, subjugate your developmental needs, hide your emotions, please others, pretend you were happy and be a “perfect daughter.†Those behaviors do not produce happy childhoods, let alone healthy adults."Now I understand why I always want to help others, especially those that resemble my dad's behavior. I had no clue I have somehow become codependent...But there is hope...
Absolutely so helpful to me. Recommend this book to anyone who is affected by alcoholism really. This book explained the behavior of every one of my siblings, including my self because of my father's alcoholism. So grateful to read about all this so I know I'm not alone in this horrible situation. I usually loan out books after I've read them but I'd rather buy this book again if someone needs it and send it to them because I'm keeping this book to refer back to when I'm depressed and feeling low about the situation. It really did give me the necessary confidence to realize it really isn't me....and that I have to separate myself from toxic people if necessary to protect my self.
I got this as suggestion by friend. It's great to relate to others who are ACA daughters as myself but I feel the author is referring too much to the 1980s and before rather than new evidence that has come out that is really helpful.Glad this book exists for those who need it.
This book was recommended by my therapist who is also an ACOA. I started this book with the intention of proving her wrong. I had no idea that nearly all of my current issues were tied so deeply to my childhood experiences (due largely to my detachment which was explained in thorough detail). It was incredibly eye-opening! Knowing what the true problems are is a tremendous relief, and it will make it so much easier to move on.
Throughout my whole life I felt excluded, lost, confused, and a stranger to myself. After recently looking for help I was told to read a book about adult children. Throughout reading this book I've started to better understand myself, my path, my past, and hope for the future. I highly recommend this book!
I have been having a lot of the issues that other ACOAs go through. I have a tendency towards perfectionism, sometimes to the point of not even starting something, because I know that I wont be perfect at it. This book, while interesting to read, wasn't enlightening. I didn't really learn anything from it that I hadn't learned from other more informative ACOA books, and I felt that it didn't fit me and my issues. It also seemed very generalized, for a book specialized towards "perfect daughters" It covered a wide range of personality types, and the ways that a daughter of an alcoholic learns to cope, just not what I 'thought' a perfect daughter was.It would be a great book for those just beginning to explore this subject, and could probably give some a feeling of not being alone in their pain.
Amazing book. I didn't realize the impact having an alcoholic parent had on me. I love that parent but the behavior still had an impact. This book gave me great insight on how that experience has contributed in good and bad ways to who I am today. It also helped answer questions I had about myself that I didn't realize were tired to having an alcoholic parent...ie anxiety. Highly recommend this book
It was hard to see myself written on pages, which lead to a lot of tears and a lot of forgotten memories. BUT it was a breath of fresh air to know I wasn't alone. For my own sanity I read pieces at a time and took a slow pace. But this book helped me see the beauty of the "Curse" that was bestowed on me, and learn to use it to my strengths. I loved how it explained how people may react to your recovery process which was something I myself was struggling with. I would recommend this book to any daughter of an Alcoholic.
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